In a move that reeks of corporate desperation disguised as strategic innovation, Grammarly has announced its acquisition of Superhuman AI for a reported $100 million—a sum that would have been considered modest for a unicorn startup three years ago but now feels like the equivalent of buying a first-class ticket on the Titanic after spotting […] More
The design software world is buzzing with news that Figma has filed for its long-awaited IPO, planning to trade under the ticker symbol “$FIG” on the New York Stock Exchange. But as any Sunday school graduate will tell you, figs and curses have a rather complicated biblical history—and Figma’s journey from Adobe’s $20 billion golden […] More
In the peculiar wonderland of modern digital entrepreneurship, where the boundaries between entertainment and enterprise have become as blurred as a TikTok filter, we encounter the curious case of Roy Lee of Cluely—a figure who exists in a quantum superposition between content creator and tech CEO, much like Alice’s cat that was simultaneously alive and […] More
How Google’s Hallucinating AI Just Became Aviation’s Most Unreliable Crash Investigator The Ministry of Truth would be proud. In a world where information flows through algorithmic channels with the authority of divine revelation, Google’s AI Overview has achieved something remarkable: it has begun rewriting aviation disasters in real-time, transforming Boeing crashes into Airbus incidents with […] More
In which Silicon Valley’s finest legal minds prove that antitrust law is really just a creative writing exercise! The most brilliant minds in Silicon Valley have finally cracked the code that has eluded philosophers, mathematicians, and divorce lawyers for centuries: the precise mathematical threshold where ownership becomes “not really ownership.” Through exhaustive research involving armies […] More
In which we discover that server downtime has become Silicon Valley’s newest form of humble-bragging The Great Digital Tantrum of 2025 When ChatGPT experiences even the briefest hiccup—a mere thirty-second delay in generating yet another mediocre haiku about productivity—the internet transforms into a digital Pompeii of despair. X becomes a wasteland of “Is ChatGPT down […] More
In what self-appointed tech historians are already calling the most predictable conflict since the invention of comment sections, the long-simmering tensions between Android users and iPhone devotees have erupted into full-scale digital warfare. It was the age of infinite customization, it was the age of walled gardens; it was the epoch of open source rebellion, […] More
In what military historians are calling “the most passive-aggressive conflict since the invention of office politics,” the decades-long rivalry between Microsoft Windows and Apple’s macOS has finally escalated into full-scale digital warfare, complete with propaganda campaigns, defector scandals, and one particularly devastating ninja attack that nobody saw coming. To be, or not to be—that is […] More
The Great Schism of 2025: A Shakespearean Tragedy in 280 Characters In the grand theater of American power, where political ambition meets algorithm and an orange ego collides with encryption, we witness the most spectacular falling-out since Steve Jobs and Steve Wozniak disagreed about garage ventilation. The Trump–Musk inevitable divorce proceedings have begun, and the […] More
A forensic analysis of the platform formerly known as Twitter’s descent into digital chaos The Case of the Missing Blue Bird In what may be the most expensive midlife crisis in human history, Elon Musk’s acquisition of Twitter for $44 billion has transformed the platform into something resembling a digital fever dream—if fever dreams included […] More
In which we examine how advertising transformed the web from humanity’s greatest library into humanity’s most sophisticated slot machine The internet was supposed to be different. Back in the 1995, when dial-up modems sang their mechanical hymns and “You’ve Got Mail” was still a source of genuine excitement rather than existential dread, the web promised […] More
In which we examine the curious case of a country that can monitor oil pipelines with drones but apparently cannot predict when rivers might overflow It was a truth universally acknowledged that Nigeria, a nation possessed of considerable technological prowess, must be in want of applying said prowess to the preservation of human life. Yet […] More
It was the best of times for Apple shareholders, it was the worst of times for anyone who thought they understood how capitalism was supposed to work. In the gleaming towers of Cupertino, where executives in $700 hoodies contemplate the profound mysteries of profit margin optimization, a solution to the US-engineered tariff crisis emerged that […] More
In the gleaming conference rooms of Silicon Valley, where venture capitalists gather like digital evangelists clutching their kombucha and quarterly projections, a curious form of doublethink has taken hold. Artificial Intelligence, they proclaim with the fervor of true believers, is simultaneously the solution to every human problem and a technology so nascent that any criticism […] More
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Simba the "Tech King"